Athlone, Dublin & Galway

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A personal reflection on our Online Personal Development Course

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“Personal development is a journey each of us takes at varying paces and is as individual as we are.  I loved this Online course as it brought me back to myself warts and all and made me take an honest look at where I am at. It takes courage to be able to dig deep into ourselves.

Nobody is perfect and neither am I.  Just like others I work hard to subconsciously protect my vulnerabilities and in doing so can impact on my relationships with others.  I rate my self-esteem as healthy however life can take a hammer to it at times.  I have developed good resilience that I can trust and depend on.  This gives me that bounce-back ability that is pivotal in navigating life’s paths.

I needed to be reminded to be more self-compassionate and kinder to myself for the mistakes and failures I made in life.  Forgiving self is not necessarily easy or comes natural. We can demonstrate compassion and kindness to others more readily.   Is this a learned behaviour or simply part of the human psyche?  Self-compassion is powerful in that it automatically develops and increases self-esteem.

We all have a critical inner voice and mine can, if allowed go unchecked, be an unkind friend at times.  I am aware of the impact this voice can have on my thought process thus my behaviour.  I must remember it is I that is in charge of whether this critical voice progresses or not.  I must be the best friend I can be to myself treating myself with regard and respect.  Replacing negative thoughts with positive thoughts is key to a balanced emotional state.

So where do we get these negative thoughts/beliefs from?  Usually from early childhood experiences thus the inner child is a constant within us all.  Sometimes the inner child is wounded and needs to be comforted and heard.  This course gave me a useful practical tip in reaching my inner child.  The mirror exercise encourages me to look at myself in the mirror while saying positive affirmations to myself.  I found this unsettling but powerful as I realised my adult eyes were the exact eyes I looked through as a child so the connection was powerful.  The goal of this exercise was working towards and ending in self-acceptance.  It helps negate negative thoughts of loneliness, feeling not good enough etc.   Its best practised before bedtime as the brain can absorb this concept throughout sleep-time.  In effect I am actually parenting/comforting myself.

Self observation is a useful tool helping develop awareness around stress.  Like all people, I can become stressed around life events or peoples responses to me.  It is important to acknowledge and manage stress.  Communication is central to all emotional wellbeing however it has to be effective communication which is something that is a learned skill.  Effective communication helps avoid misunderstandings however creates a better understanding of our emotions.   Everybody wants and needs to feel truly heard.

The way you feel rather than what you think is what motivates communication.  This requires both thinking and feeling.  Getting a healthy balance on these is the ultimate goal.

I found this online course in Personal Development to be thought provoking and certainly an asset to me personally.  It will also be a useful tool to implement in my therapy with clients.  Personal Development is a life long journey and it is never too late to get started”.

Ruth Roe, MIACP

Counsellor & Psychotherapist, Kildare Area. Email: ruthroe2@gmail.com

For more information on our Online Personal Development Course see here

Alan holds a Masters Degree and Graduate Diploma in Integrative Psychotherapy from the University of Limerick. He has worked in private practice in Limerick and Ennis for many years. He has lectured on research on the Psychotherapy M.A. in U.L., and worked as a group facilitator on the M.A. in Music Therapy in U.L. Alan also holds a Higher National Diploma and Bachelors Degree in Irish Music, and has taught guitar on the B.A. in Irish Music and Dance at the Irish World Academy. As a professional musician he has toured extensively throughout Ireland and Europe with various artists. Alan’s interests include auto-ethnographic and heuristic approaches to research, personal development, and transpersonal approaches to psychotherapy. He continues to get great enjoyment from music, playing regularly in the Limerick and Ennis scene, as well as working on various recording projects. He values the personal development of student therapists and the effective integration of this with skills and theory.